Saturday night was Hockey night. The game started at 10:50something. Most hockey nights are late nights. By the time the game is over, get all the gear off, clean up, get dressed, etc. it's well past midnight. Then they usually grab a beer or two so 1-2AMish is not out of the question.
A couple of weeks ago I stayed up and waited for Billy and it was nice, we had a chance to chat about the game, I got to see him in a good mood, we both went to bed "together" and it didn't seem like that much to do. I mean he's not going to give up hockey so I've tried to adapt some to it...not happily but I tried.
This past Saturday I tried the same thing, but crashed sometime after 3am. After the game there were beers adn after that they went to have an early breakfast. I was mad to say the least. He seems to think that since it's after the kids are in bed, he can go and be out as long as he wants. He doesn't get the fact that he is MARRIED, HAs KIDS, and being out to 4am, on a regular basis, is not acceptable.

We had to get up early and go to the lodge for the breakfast. He asked me if I would go with him and the boys, the boys also asked, so I agreed. I got there and the second we walked in the door I felt invisiable. He was over with his brother, SIL and another person from the team. They were all laughing and joking about what happened the night before etc. I felt completely like a 3rd wheel. It made me so mad that I helped with a little bit of the set up and I told him I didn't feel good so I went home.

I'm so mad and hurt and jealous. Yes, I'm glad he has outside interests and I don't want to be one of those wives who feels like thier husbands can't do anything without them. On the other hand I think I'm a very understanding wife who now feels completely taken advantage of. I'm mad that I don't get to spend that time with him, I don't get to see the fun guy, the excitement he feels when he plays. I feel excluded and I don't even have the option. Who am I going to get to watch the kids from 10pm to 4am? No one, so it's not even fair for him to say that I'm welcome when he knows damn well it's not an option.

And he has zero clue why I"m upset. I don't think he was doing anything wrong per se. I dont' think he was out doing another girl(sorry for the crude term) but he was out, away, gone, from the family, and he has been, A LOT lately(he has been averaging being gone 4 nights out of 7)

It's great the he calls himself Merlin now, joking he is aging backwards, and it's great that he has his friend Scott and his brother to hang out with. They don't have kids, they have wives who can(and do) go to the games, and hang out afterwards. I'm really angry that he gets to let all that fun out and have such a great time with everyone but me. I get the tired, grumpy, husband and I'm the one that has to talk about all the boring/annoying stuff of life. The rest of his circle gets the fun guy, the guy I don't ever get to see and it pisses me off.

I also refuse to talk to him about this again. We've been around and around it about a million times. His point is he's not doing anything wrong, the kids are in bed 90% of the time he's gone so he's going and he's doing it and I just have to accept it.