Sarah527 Blog

The life of a single mom of two boys as she explores new ideas, new thoughts, and a new career.

Tuesday, May 31, 2005

What an amazing weekend!!

Not only was it it a 3 day weekend which already makes it great, it also turned out to be one of the best weekends I've had in long, long time.

I first have to apologize to my husband. I whined early on Friday about my birthday and he really came through. He bought me my favorite Thai food take out for dinner while he made chicken nuggets for the kids. He also got me a card from him and one from the kids. He also bought me 3 presents!!!!

First he got me the Star Wars Lego game. I've wanted it for awhile because it looks like such fun and it would be good to have in the house for the kids to play.

He also bought me something I can't say but it's little and lacy and makes me feel pretty. I know some women don't like things like this but I do. I helps reminds me that I'm not just a mom or housekeeper but still a woman too...It's also nice to that even after 17 years of monogamy that he still finds me attractive in that way.

He also tried to buy me a new shirt. He knew I was complaining the other day that I had nothing in my closet other than "mom" clothes(sweats, jeans, shorts, big t-shirts) so he tried. Of course with clothes now a days it was almost impossible for him to do himself but he tried.

After we all ate he dragged me to his mom's house telling me she wanted to show off her new stove. When we got there she had made me a cake, not a cake from a box with canned frosting(which would of been great) but a real from scratch kind of cake. It was soooo good, and soooo sugary.

After cake we came home and I spent a couple of hours on the Star Wars game. I sat down with the intention of just playing for a few minutes and then turning it over to the kids. Next thing I knew an hour had flown by. We all had a great time, taking turns, giving tips. It's got to be one of the best Birthday gifts in a long time.

Saturday and Sunday were spent doing nothing important. Billy dragged me to the mall on Saturday to return the shirt he bought(that didn't fit) and we spent a good three hours there while he insisted on me getting myself something. I ended up with 4 shirts total and even though it was frustrating I was glad Billy insisted. I now have something nice to wear to me concert next week!!

On Memorial Day Billy and the boys marched in the parade with the lodge. The boys handed out flags. We stayed for the Memorial Service in the center of the city. I'm really proud of how our town honors Memorial day. No clowns, or politicking is allowed in the parade or on the sidelines and the whole thing is really handled with a lot of respect and dignity.

After the parade we went to Mary's for the lodge picnic. We were there most of the afternoon, we had a lot of good food, hung out with some good friends and the kids had a blast playing.

We were all tuckered out by the day outside and were all in bed early.

Poor G work up this morning sick though. The poor baby has pink eye again and a very stuffy nose. I'm glad school is over for him. I have some eye drops left from last time we all had pink eye so we don't have to head to the dr's unless he starts to run a fever or is still sick in a few days. He says nothing hurts except for a headache and his eyes.

The best part of the weekend was the weather. The weather men told us all that the all weekend was supposed to be cold, cloudy and rainy on all three days. Instead everyday it was sunny and warm. We got a touch of rain Saturday night but it was maybe 20 minutes.

All in all it was such a great weekend and I didn't stitch once!!! I hope we have many more of them as the summer progresses.

Oh yeah, I forgot to mention I saw the movie "The Anchorman" with Will Ferrell Sunday night. OMG, what a hysterical movie. I think it is now my new favorite movie and I need to go buy this on DVD. Admitedly it had a couple of slow spots and it was a lot of slapstick type humor but it made me laugh so hard that it made me sides ache. If you haven't seen it, you should!!

Only 8 days to my concert!!!!

Friday, May 27, 2005

Today is my birthday!!!

I'm 38 today. I don't think to much about age, I think I look more or less then same as I've always looked...Well, as long as I keep grey covered(which I've been getting since I was 23 so it's not all an age thing). I had a moment last week where I felt old in an instant. I got an invitation to my niece's graduation/happy 18th birthday celebration. She was a little over two when DH and I were married. One of my favorite pictures/memories from my wedding was DH and I dancing with her in our arms. She had this HUGE red kool-aid smile. I couldn't believe that two year old is now a young woman. I mean I see her most mornings, I knew she was growing, knew she was graduating but something about seeing it in black and white made it hit home.

On the very same day I received a letter in mail address to my maiden name....A name I hadn't seen in ages!! In it I found an invitation to my 20th high school reunion. 20 years?!? Where did the time go?!? Seems like just yesterday *I* was graduating and my whole life was before me with endless possibilities. Again I *knew* this was coming but see it in black and white made it hit home.

Each thing by itself my not of made an impact but the two, on the same day, made me feel ancient in an instant.

Realistically I know I'm only a day older than yesterday and will be a day older tomorrow. I also know that 38 is not old, I still ::knock wood:: have my whole life ahead of me, lots of possibilities and lots to look forward to. Still 38...Man, that sounds OLD!!

For fun I dragged out my high school yearbook not to long ago. Donovan was asking questions about high school and found it interesting that Billy and I went to the same school(though we never knew each other). Since I had just cleaned out a closet I knew where my book was so I dragged it out and showed it to him. He thought it was hysterically funny!!

So in honor of my high school reunion and my birthday I decided to include my senior picture...I look pretty much the same:
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As for my birthday plans, I plan to get the kitchen and bathroom cleaned(both I've put off for a couple of days). Donovan has a 1/2 day today so I'm sure most of the afternoon will be spent keeping track of both of the boys. Other than that I don't think I will be doing much. Originally we had planned on going out but DH and I couldn't agree on what to do with the kids so we aren't going anywhere.

On the bright side I treated myself to some cross stitch fabric and I've been having fun stitching on it this week and honestly I don't really need anything. I was greeted to several pretty funny e-cards in my inbox this morning by some really good friends and Gaelan woke me up with a big hug and a loud Happy Birthday!! What more could I want? I could go whine a little about how I told DH exactly what I wanted, and how I wanted to celebrate my birthday and that he couldn't find the time to do either but I won't. It's a waste of energy. I love Billy and he's an amazing husband. It's just when it comes to gifts, celebrations, and holidays he just doesn't do so well. I just have to learn to accept that and not take his lack of gift giving skills as a lack of love.

Though I at least better get a card(I didn't last year, not from him, not from the kids)...If I can get a Birthday e-card from Webshots, I better get one from my husband!!

Thursday, May 26, 2005

Last Morning Alone!!

Today is G's last day of school which means it's my last morning where I will have almost 3 hours to myself. Part of me is looking forward to not having to take him to school. The car situation is really starting to be a drag and not having to worry 4 days every week about how everyone is going to get everywhere will be nice. I also will love having him home with me all day again. I miss the little guy when he's gone. And honestly of my two boys he is the easiest. He is very good and playing/entertaining himself.

On the other hand there will be certain times I will miss having the alone time. No more morning trips to the grocery store alone, no more trips to the library alone(unless I go in the evening but it's pretty busy then with kids), and no more morning naps. I love naps!! I always have and a few times being able to come home after dropping him off, catching an extra hour or so has been heavenly, especially this past Jan/Feb when we were all so sick. If I hadn't had that morning nap I don't know if I could of kept moving.

G is also looking forward to school being over. I've asked him if he will miss his friends at school or his teachers and he says NO....No hesitating, no thinking, just no!

I think he this year has been good for him. He has had fun(though he may not admit). He has also learned so much. He can now write his name, can pretty much count to 100 with some coaching(mainly in the teens, and going from say 39 to 40). He is also very interested in numbers and doing math. I think he may have an aptitude for it. He has also grown a lot emotionally and uses his "words" to express his feelings, instead of just hitting. Those are things I've tried to teach at home but he grasped better in a school setting. He has also developed a love for art(he still likes to look at the pictures from the 16 church :D) I had initially been disappointed that I couldn't send G to a private school like Donovan for the same program but I have to say I think that G's program may of been better than one we paid for.

They are having a party this morning so I'm going to get some fresh bagels this morning after taking Donovan to the bus. After that dropping G off at school I'm coming home and taking my last nap until September!!!

Wednesday, May 25, 2005

Some stitching pictures this morning.

Here is the first progress picture on my new project, "Christmas Flourishes"

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Designed by Nora Corbett, Copyright Mirabilia Designs

I'm stitching it on 32 ct. "Sapphire Sky" hand dyed Lugana from Silkweavers. It doesn't look like much at this point but it's fun to stitch on. The fabric is a beautiful blue!!

This is an older Mirabilia project I just recently pulled out. It's called "Fairy Tales":

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designed by Nora Corbett, Copyright Mirabilia Designs

It's stitched on 32 count Blue Wing lugana.

I hope to finish one or both this year!!

I did watch the Rob and Amber wedding last night. I really enjoyed it. Man, did he look smoking hot!!! She looked gorgeous in her dress and most importantly they looked really happy and in love. How amazing to have a wedding like that. It just might be worth giving up a little "privacy" to be able to pull something like that off. I must confess to getting a little choked up during the vows, of course I always do when I see/hear a wedding. It's such a leap of faith and on that day most people are so in love. I love the where the minister(or JP) that married them talked about looking at their hands and know that they were going to be the hands that will hold your children and hold you when you are are old :sniff, sniff:

DH was home last night since he didn't have a lodge meeting. He was such a great guy and "watched" with me. He even threw in a word or two here and there to make it seem like he was paying attention. For the most part he was playing online and chatting with his brother via ICQ but I appreciated his effort.

I did indeed stitch the morning away yesterday but did get some more spring cleaning done. I'm taking it room by room and slowly. I got the dining room cleaned from top to bottom. I even took apart the ceiling fan and washed all that. I have a lovely built in glass display case in there as well and I took all my knick knacks out, dusted, rearranged them, and put them back. I love that little display case. In it I have tea cups that belonged to my Great Grandmother, My Grandmother, My mom, and to me. I also have a tea pot my beloved Great Aunt made during her pottery days in the 70's. They are nice reminders of the people I've lost and I love having them where I can see them everyday.

Today I'm working on our room. I've already got some stuff moved to the basement and to the attic. I'm soaking our mini blinds right now and will give the windows a good washing after I drop G off at school. I should really clean out the closet but I don't think I'm so inclined today. Tomorrow I will tackle the kitchen and bathroom.

Tonight baseball starts for the boys. We signed them both up and of course they both play on different fields at the same time. Dh and I will have to split up. I'll take G tonight, he'll take Donovan, and next week we will switch. G will be doing T-Ball and Donovan will be playing Coach Pitch softball. Thankfully today will be a tad warmer than yesterday.

Tuesday, May 24, 2005

I've been ordered to stitch!!

I was in the process of cleaning the house. I need to mop my floors and I was going to clean the blinds in the bedroom, move some stuff downstairs, some stuff to the attic and basically make good use of the 2 or so hours I have while the boys are in school since starting Friday G is done with school. Billy called home to say good morning and asked me what my plans were for the morning. I told him and he asked me what I wanted to do. I told him that I really wanted to stitch. I got my new fabric yesterday, did the floss toss(it's a great color) and I got all the floss sorted for it. I'm itching to start it. Billy told me, no, basically ordered me to go stitch. The house will wait, the floors will wait, and I should take these last few uninterrupted hours and do what I want with them. So I'm going to stitch....

I do have a few random thoughts entertainment thoughts:

What is up with Tom Cruise. Ok, I GET it, you are in love but after a month? Is she with him? In most pictures I've seen of the two of them he is all over her and she looks very uncomfortable.

Carls Jr. Has picked Paris Hilton as a spokesperson? For once I agree with Howard Stern on something. What a weird choice. For one she looks like she never eats anything and on the other hand she's done like what 3 "home porno's", is vapid, and only known for being a party girl. This is who you want to represent your product?

And speaking of not eating Lindsey Lohan looks awful!!! She is too skinny, you can seen bone sticking out. I can't believe that there are guys that actually like that look. How is that attractive? The redhead from "Desperate Housewives" was like that on a show I saw the other day. She had a v-necked dress on and I swear I could count her ribs between her clevage. It seems like these days the stars are getting skinnier and skinnier while the rest of America is getting heavier. There has to be a happy medium and you can't tell me to actually "see" ribs, backbones etc. is healthy. That blonde is not a good look for her either. Completely washes her out. The opening monolouge on SNL was very funny though. Hey, if I was young, pretty, and rich, I think I would not be spending a lot of time sleeping.

Britney and Kevin are back on TV tonight. Ok, I'll confess, I watched last week...At least I tried to. I turned it off after the 85th time she made the pig face, which was about 10 minutes in. I guess the ratings were bad as well. I will not be tuning in for another try.

Rob and Amber are getting married tonight on TV. Ok, I'll confess here to, I'm going to watch. I've said it before I like Rob(and not just because he's hot as hell but it helps). I like his arrogant attitude. Billy has a touch of the same kind of attitude which is one of the things that attracted me to him. Billy is a much nicer guy all around but he has his arrogant moments. I don't know if I would trust Rob with my money but he would be fun to hang with.

No "Gilmore Girls", no "Amazing Race" tonight, I'll miss them....

15 days to my concert!! I'm still super excited. I'm starting to ponder what to wear...The t-shirt idea didn't really pan out so I'm not sure what to wear. I don't want to look like someone's mom. Maybe this weekend I will head out and see if I can find a new shirt or something. I needs to be pink, definitely.

Billy is going to be late tonight. He sure works hard, too hard. I wish I could order him to spend the morning doing something he wants instead of work but he wouldn't listen to me.

So I'm off to do as ordered and stitch for the next 2 hours!!

Monday, May 23, 2005

A good weekend!!

It's Monay!! only 3 more days of school for G, only 14 days of school for Donovan(not counting weekends, holidays) and 16 days to my concert!! Lots to look forward to.

On Saturday the weather was GLORIOUS!! It was sunny, breezy, 72, hardly in clouds in the sky, a picture perfect day. We spent the day at the Selfridge Air Show. We got there early and got to see lots of planes and military vehicles. The boys had a blast getting in and out of them all. Here are a couple of pictures:

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I think he had fun but the day tuckered him out.

We stayed most of the day. I was lucky enough to find a piece of shade, spread out a blanket, and stitched on a small ornament while my "guys" had a blast looking at all the planes and the flying. We left a little early so we didn't get to see the Blue Angels fly but saw just about everything else. We were all pretty hungry and it was super exspensive to eat there(no coolers allowed). Next time we think we may hang out in the area where we parked. It was shady, we could have a cooler there, they had a port- a- potty and a lot less people. There was maybe 20 people doing that same thing. We also saw a lot of people tailgating at a nearby Wal-Mart. Something definitely to consider next time we go.

On the way home we stopped at a local pub where we know the cook. We had some awesome bar burgers, played a game of pool before heading home.

Sunday we hung around the house. My "guys" worked on the yard, made a trip to home depot, and did guy things while I hung in the house getting the laundry done. I wasn't feeling 100% so I worked in a nap as well. I really hate being a girl sometimes!!

This morning I was happy to find some fabric that I had ordered on Friday in my mail box. What great service!! One is a hand dyed that was on sale and it is so pretty and very much like it was pictured. I have to do an offical "floss" toss to make sure but I think it's perfect for a planned start. I'm trying to be good and finish up one more thing before I start on it but I may not be able to resist the urge!! The fabric was a birthday treat to myself!!

I hate to mention this again but I'm going to have to. It's quite clear that someone will not let it go. Please, do. I've had enough, I've had enough snickering, I have enough talking about me, ENOUGH!! Seriously, I'm well over this, I wish you well, have a great life, but move on, really it's time. Just because I will not do business with your company does not mean it's all about you. I liked Wal-Mart. They were much cheaper, and faster. I found the selection adequate for my needs and do not want to switch to NetFlix. I don't want to pay the extra money for what doesn't seem like "more" or "better" service. Plain and simple!!

Friday, May 20, 2005

What a good couple of days!!

First the good news...I have another stitching happy dance:

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Designed by Just Nan, copyright Nan Caldera 1997

It's stitched on 28ct natural linen using DMC floss and hex beads/crystals from the JN embelishment pack. I started it back in late February and finished it yesterday afternoon. In that period of time I would say I worked on it about 18-20 days. Once you got the white snowflake background in the rest of the pattern worked up really quickly. The picture doesn't do it justice but it's super sparkly with the Hex beads, crystals and lots of #4 braid. It's almost too sparkly...

I'm glad to get another project finished. It's also nice to be excited about stitching again. I'm thinking about what project I want to do next and I'm going to treat myself for some fabric later today.

Like I said the past couple of days have been really nice. On Wednesday we all slept in IE overslept. It turned out to be a good thing since I think we all needed that 45 minutes of sleep extra sleep. I had originally been awake at 5am when Dh went to work. I normally get up then but I just didn't want to get out of bed(something I hadn't felt in a long time) so I rolled over and next thing I knew it was 7:10am. It was no biggie since Donovan's school doesn't start until 8am(his bus gets him at 7:25am) so I just drove him to school.

I also went with G and his class on a field trip to the zoo. It was a lot of fun but a bit stressful. It seemed like every other school in the area were there that day so there were lots of kids running around. G was really good and stayed close but keeping track of all the other kids were stressful. We had a lot of help so it wasn't bad. We didn't see very much of the zoo but the kids got to see the animal they adopted, a Zebra, and were very excited to see it.

It was also nice to talk to some of the other parents. I got so many compliments from them about how great G was. One mom helped out on a recent field trip to the high school where the kids had a bake sale to raise the money to adopt the animal. She said G was the most outgoing, best seller, most focused out of all the kids. She said she was very impressed with him. One of the dads had been his "partner" on another field trip and also said how great G was. He's such a great kid and I wonder how he turned out so well? Not to brag but there is something special about G(I'm not saying that there isn't anything great and special about Donovan) that people really react to. When he turns on the cute he is almost irresistible!!!

Wednesday evening we got to go up to Donovan's school to see the stories and artwork the kids have been doing. Donovan was very excited about showing off his stuff and talked about it fora a week. He has really improved in both his writing and coloring skills. He wrote a good story about the life cycle of a butterfly and there was artwork of butterflies, caterpillars and flowers. I also got a chance to chat with his teacher who for once didn't use the word shy!!! She said that he has really started to settle down and his reading scores have improved so much. I thought as much since he is reading super well at home. It was nice for once to hear something positive come out of her mouth and nice to see that he is able to show his improvements at school.

Yesterday was a quiet day. G didn't have school so I had most of the day free after dropping Donovan off at the bus stop. I did the minimal work around the house and spent most of the day stitching. I also watched "Phantom of the Opera". I really enjoyed the movie. I have never seen the play, or any other movies, or read the book so I was I had no preconceived notions. I thought it was beautifully shot and the clothes were gorgeous, the singing breathtaking and a fun way to spend a couple of hours.

I've been enjoying my Wal-Mart DVD service but am sad to see that it is coming to an end. I got an e-mail yesterday saying beginning June 16th they will be merging with Netflix. Since I can't give my money to Netflix this means no more home delivery of DVD's for me(unless I try blockbuster which I might). I liked wal-mart because they were a lot cheaper and faster since they had a shipping station in Detroit as opposed to Netflix which is in Lansing. Maybe I might have to do it the old fashioned way and actually go to the video store... I do have a couple of weeks to get a few more movies.

And of course how could I forgot to mention today is an anniversary of sorts. 17 years ago today was the anniversary of my first date with Billy. Billy was room mates with a good friend of mine from high school named Scott. I had met Billy on several occasions when I went to see Scott but had never had the chance to seriously talk to him(he always seemed to be on the way out as I was coming in). The three of us that night just kind of hung out, talked, had a few wine coolers. Billy was really funny and made me laugh to the point my sides hurt. As the night progressed I found myself really drawn to him(I remember thinking how great he smelled).

It was a bit confusing because I was technically engaged at the time(I had a ring but was very unhappy with the relationship). Scott eventually fell asleep and about 3am I knew I had to head home. Billy being the gentlemen he is walked me to my car and before I got in, grabbed me, kissed me and I knew that was it. My heart pounded, my toes curled, and in an instant I knew he was the *one*. It was pretty tricky from there. The guy I was engaged too was very well liked by my family and he was a *safe, easy* relationship. Within days however I had broke the engagement and within a month was seeing Billy exclusively. My mom only lived another 18months and I don't think she ever really warmed up to Billy. Not that he isn't a nice guy but Billy really encouraged me to think, do and be myself. I think that was hard for my mom and other family members to take.

The last 17 years haven't all been perfect. The last two in particular have been hard but I still love him, he still makes my heart beat fast, toes curl and makes me laugh like on one else can. Along with him I was blessed to get an incredible family that has really made me feel like one of them and he has given me two great kids. I couldn't imagine at that moment when he kissed how my life was going to change but I couldn't ask for anything better. I may not be exactly where I want to be housewise or finance wise or where I thought I would be at this point in my life(still at home rasing the kids instead of working or going back to school) but where I am is pretty damn good!!

I'm looking forward to another easy day, G is off from school and I have no place I have to be until 3:20pm when I get Donovan from the bus stop. I do have to get a bit more done around the house today than yesterday but I will fit in some stitching today. I've dragged out an old WIP "Fairy Tales" and I'm looking forward on working on it.

Tuesday, May 17, 2005

Did I mention I'm anxious for school to get out?

This morning started out really nice. We all got a good nights sleep, Billy was in a good mood, the kids were in a good mood and I was looking forward to a day filled with some errands.

Donovan lately has wanted to be the first one at the bus stop so he can get on the bus first and therefore chose the "best" seat. We were a couple of minutes behind today so instead of walking the two blocks to the bus stop we drove. I waited in the car until the bus pulled away and proceeded back home. It would be a very confusing story ito explain if you aren't familiar with the area but the gist of it was I was stopped, someone was trying to turn around in the middle of the street and backed into me. Of course they were driving a big SUV while I was in my little Neon. Her car sustained zero damage while mine has a good sized dent and chipped paint on the drivers side of the car above the tire.

This is my first ever accident(I've never had a ticket either). I did what I was supposed to. I had my insurance, registration and license out. She came out of her car yelling at *me*, that it was my fault, that I was pulled behind her(I was stopped remember). I refused to yell, or get upset, or assign blame. I asked for her info, which she then refused to give. She said I could give her *my* info and she would contact me. I didn't know what to do. I was uncomfortable with providing personal info with none in return. Since I don't have a cell phone(well, I do it just doesn't have any minutes on it) and was just two blocks from home I told her I was going home and calling the police, which I did.

A couple of hours later the cop came to the house. I was very, very nervous since I felt like I left the accident site. I was also worried that some how I was going to be to blame and that I was going to get a ticket(paranoid I know). I explained calmly what happened, that she was trying to turn around basically in the middle of the street and that I was stopped behind another car waiting to go through a stop sign when she hit me. He said it was obvious from the dent that I wasn't moving when I was hit. She was clearly at fault since she was turning around where she shouldn't of been. She doesn't intend to file with her insurance company(yeah, since she has zero damage on her car) and we have a $1,000 deductible so we don't intent to either.

He took what he called an "informational" report instead of a "true" report because a full report would be turned into both insurance companies as an accident report and *could* be used against us to jack up our rates whether a claim of any kind was filed. It's on file in case we do change our minds and want to pursue it with the insurance company.

I'm going to have my FIL look a the car for sure when I pick G up from school because he used to own a bump/paint shop. I'm pretty sure it's nothing more than cosmetic but I have a bunch of errands I want to run today and I don't want to drive it very far without making sure it's Ok.

I was really frustrated trying to get a hold of Billy this morning. I realized I didn't have his new number at work, we put it on Donovan/G emergency contact cards at school but I don't have it written down anywhere. I called his cell phone(which is how I get a hold of him if I need too. The are pretty picky about personal calls. I never call the cell phone unless it's urgent and instead I will send him a text message if I need to ). For some reason he wasn't picking up and wasn't calling me back even though I left 3 messages. I then looked the company up in the phone book but the number I got was a fax number. I then tried the various numbers he has called us at home from our caller ID(thank goodness I don't erase it often). All I got from all the numbers were a recording telling to put in my parties extension which I didn't know(and he doesn't have one anyway). Finally I got a human,who I told who I was and that it was a slight emergency but she didn't know who DH was. She was able to transfer me to his department and I finally got to him.

He misunderstood me and thought *I* first got hit, like punched at the but stop and then thought I had been *hit* by a car while I was walking. Both freaked him out but then he realized it was the car that got hit. He took it really well. A lot of husbands, whether it was the wives fault or not, might of gotten mad. He didn't at all, just more concerned for me, who admittedly at this point was a little upset. I know it's not a big deal but it was a big deal to me. I was minding my own business and got hit. It seemed BIG to me at least...

It's wired that I've lived in this city 8 years this August. In all that time I've only had to call the police 4 times, 3 of those have been in the last 10 days alone(twice for our neighbors and now this morning). The guy who was here was very nice and very professional. I hope it's a long, long, long time before I have to call them again!!!

Monday, May 16, 2005

Warning: I'm feeling cranky this morning!!!

I had such a great weekend and was really looking forward to the upcoming week. Unfortunately it started way, way earlier than I wanted. My neighbors have been pretty good neighbors until the past week. About a week ago they had a HUGE fight about midnight. The cops were called, they broke it up and we all went back to sleep. During the next day again a fight broke out but since it was daytime there wasn't much you could do but close the blinds. It was pretty brief but seemed really explosive. This morning about 4:15am I woke up hearing a really strange noise. I thought it was a weird dove or something because it was kind of a cooing sound, only louder and more high pitched. This went on for a good ten minutes before it started to get louder and louder and louder. It then turned into full scale wailing(and I mean WAILING). An argument broke out(I suspect another occupant of the house was telling her to be quiet), I heard her leave the house and proceed to get sick what sounded like right outside my window. It's still pretty chilly here in Michigan so my windows were closed(storms are still down on 2 of the 3 windows) so if I could hear it through the windows and over the furnace, it was LOUD. She then started in again on the wailing. I finally gave in, called the police(I didn't call the last time but was about too) because this had been going on a good 45 minutes at this point. I mean I try to be sympathetic, if you are sick or upset can't you do it inside, a tad quieter? The cops came and didn't improve the situation much. There was much more arguing and I heard the cops trying to talk to them. All in all 3 cops ended up there and it went on another 20 minutes before they left with one cop saying loudly and forcibly that he didn't want to have to come back again. Finally it was still, quiet and peaceful, I lay back down, close my eyes and sure enough the alarm went off. I just got up. Granted it was only about a 90mins earlier than normal but man, there is a big difference between 4am and 5:30am.

Now on to the good stuff. I had a great weekend!! I didn't get all I wanted done, done but still it was good. On Saturday I did get my pantry cleaned out and vacuumed. I got to read some, I got to nap some and DH and I watched "National Treasure" together. I know some people didn't' t like the movie but we both really enjoyed it. As a Mason Billy liked to see them portrayed in a better light than normal. Usually they are some psycho(Like in the Johnny Depp Jack the Ripper movie) or as people plotting to take over the world. According to Dh they were a little fast and loose with the history of the organization and their connection to the Knights Templar but we enjoyed it.

On Sunday we all went to the zoo. It was a cold, cloudy day but sometimes those are the best days to go on. The animals were really active and we got to see a lot of animals actually moving around instead of just laying around. That's my only complaint about the zoo. It doesn't open until 10am and I wish they would open earlier. Instead you spend a good majority of you zoo trip during the hottest part of the day. They do have a few evenings during the summer where members can stay until 7pm but it's not the same as first thing in the morning. We also got to see the new polar bear cub who was out with his mom. I"ll have to download some of the pictures we took.

Billy had a "close" encounter with wildlife while we were there. G wanted to go through the frog exhibit while Donovan didn't. Billy and Donovan waited at the exit while G and I went through. When I was leaving the building there was a sign warning that a bird was nesting close to the exit and to beware that it may fly closer than normal to you. When we got to Billy and Donovan, Donovan was chatting away that DH had been "attacked" by a bird. I guess he got to close to the nest and the bird actually landed on his head and pecked him a few times until they moved. Donovan thought it was cool, Billy was less than amused and he had a little cut on the top of his head as a memento of his trip. I guess maybe they should post a sign *outside* the building as well.

After dinner Billy had to go back out to the office. The boys were happy to watch a movie downstairs so I watched a movie upstairs..."The Terminal" with Tom Hanks. It wasn't a bad movie, a little slow in spots but it was good. I then did baths and bedtime and settled down to watch the finale of "Survivor".

The first hour was really good and a bit of a nail biter, would Ian get to stay. I was so happy when he won the fire challenge. Jen really didn't deserve to be there. Then the moved to the final challenge which you knew would be "who can stand the longest somewhere". It was no surprise that Katie gave in after about 6 hours(which was about 5 hours and 55 minutes longer than I would of lasted so good for her). I couldn't believe that Tom and Ian stood there that long. I also was super excited when Tom offered Ian the deal if he gave up, he'd vote Katie out. I thought Ian would jump at it, but didn't!! I was further shocked when Ian gave up in favor of Katie. Honor and all that blah, blah, friendship, blah, blah. While I admire these traits in people and they are noble thoughts I was yelling at the TV "IT'S A GAME SHOW PEOPLE"!!! Sure, I doubt Ian would of won against Tom but to give up the chance to even try was STUPID. I kept waiting for Tom to come to his senses, Katie didn't deserve to be there and I waited until he actually said he voted off Katie before turning the TV off. I was disgusted. I went to bed. I was not surprised to see this morning that Tom did indeed win and I'm happy for him. He did deserve it. He played physically very well and I think he played a pretty decent above the board "game" part too. I still can't believe Katie was number 2.

I'm looking forward to a nap this morning to get back my 90 or so mintues of sleep that I lost this morning thanks to my neighbors. I better enjoy these last few mornings with both in school since G only has 7 school days left(3 this week, 4 next week). It's going to be a another cold, cloudy day, with temps barely getting to 60. Again this morning we all had our winter coats on on the way to the bus stop and the furnace is still kicking on in the morning. Will summer ever get here?

Sunday, May 15, 2005

All about G's new best friend!!

Last night Gaelan and I were snuggling. He decided to tell me all about his imaginary friend so here's what I know about my sons new best friend.

He is made of play-doh, his name is simply play-doh, he's blue, about 3 feet tall, was born on the imaginary play-doh planet. Play-doh just had a birthday so he's 3. He had about a 100 people at his party and his theme was "Blues Clues". Coincidently both Play-Doh and G like to watch the same cartoons. Play-Doh likes to eat waffles, onions and chicken patties. Play-Doh however does not sleep in the room with G and Donovan because silly me didn't realize that imaginary friends don't get tired. Instead Play-Doh stays up all night playing video games and tells G about it in the morning. Play-Doh likes to sit in the front seat of the car when we go somewhere. If all of us go and the front seat isn't available then Play-Doh sits in the trunk. Play-Doh goes to school with G everyday but waits by his locker, except when they were doing the science stuff, then play-doh came in the room but no one else saw him so that was ok. Play-Doh will often do things he shouldn't like write on G's hand(which G likes to call a tattoo). Play-Doh also makes G play in the bathroom sink and he's the one who gets water all over the place, not G.

The best part is Play-doh likes to stay here because I'm such a great mom!!

Saturday, May 14, 2005

Here she is:

Image hosted by
Pattern designed by Jennifer Aikman-Smith, Copyright Dragon Dreams

She's stitched on white Jobelan using different colors of an overdyed floss, metallic braid and black silk bella. She took just about a week to complete. It's my first blackwork piece and I really enjoyed how quickly she stitched up.

Now what to work on....

I'm not sure how much stitching I'm going to get done this weekend. I have a couple of projects around the house I want to get to. I want to clean out the pantry in the kitchen. It's a big huge cupboard which I love but the shelves are so deep that sometimes it's easy to lose track of things way in the back. My goal is to take everything out, get rid of the old stuff and give it a good vacuuming.

I also hope to have Dh help me clean out a room in our basement. There are things in there that haven't been touched/moved/looked at since we moved in 8 years ago. It's time to get rid of some of. I also hope to finish my final stash overhaul and get what's left put away.

If I have time I would love to make a trip to Jo-Ann fabrics and buy some fabric. I bought a cool pattern to make a very cute, circle, drawstring bag to put all your stitching goodies in. A friend has one of these bags and I was really happy to find the pattern on Ebay for only a couple of bucks. I'm itching to drag my sewing machine out and see if I can do it. It only takes a couple of yards of fabric so it wouldn't cost to much to give it a try.

DH got called back to work this morning so he's at work right now. The chance of getting everything done I want to this weekend is slim I know. I do have the pantry have emptied though so I should get back to that.

Friday, May 13, 2005

She's done!!! I just put in the final stitches in my "Blackwork Princess". She goregous and I'm so glad I pushed myself to finish her. I personlized her with some of my own colors and I happy with how it turned out. She also sparked a lot of good memories as I stitched her.

I'll have to wait until tomorrow for a scan. Billy's computer is still acting funny. We are still unsure if the problems we've been having this week are all modem issues, all computer problems or a combination of both. Billy is too tired tonight to try to figure it out(he worked 60 hours this week, with a couple of more hours required on Sunday)

Major computer problems!!

I don't know if it's my system, the modem or the online world in general but I've been having all sorts of problems getting on-line and staying on-line most of the week. I've tried writing this about a dozen times all morning and hopefully this will go through.

Maybe it's a sign that I need to spend more time stitching or reading then computing so I think I'm going to least until Billy gets home and can hopefully figure out and solve the problem.

No "Blackwork Princess" happy dance to show. I got distracted yesterday by a nap(oh I love those in the morning when the kids are in school), One Life to Live, and company after dinner. Surely by tomorrow though. I'm down to just the vines and flowers so I'm in the home stretch.

I hope some of you who I owe e-mail too are reading this understand I'm not ignoring or being bitchy. I just can't get to it!!!

Thursday, May 12, 2005

Hey, what happened to summer?!

After a couple of warm, sunny, summer like days, I woke up this morning to the sound of the heat being on. After the rain yesterday a cold front has moved through. The temp this morning was 44 with the high today being only 53. It may warm up a touch more over the weekend but not by much. Of course this is my fault since I got all the summer stuff out and washed along with taking the warm blanket from our bed. I don't know why I'm so anxious for summer to start but I am. I find myself really longing to have both boys home, sitting on my deck, enjoying the sun and watching the kids play in the sprinkler or just running around. I've really enjoyed the 2 1/2 hours I have each morning while they are both in school but I am looking forward to having them home with me. Of course talk to me in mid-July....

Donovan is really looking forward to the end of the year too. It's been a real roller coaster with him this year. Some days he goes to school without a fuss, other days, like today, it's a real struggle to get out the door. He was crying at the bus stop that he didn't want to go. The only thing that got him on the bus was the thought that he was going to have mini-pancakes and sausage for lunch.

Poor Billy is having more trouble at work. I don't understand it all but they were switching something on their system and it's caused all sorts of problems. Yesterday he worked 16.5 hours so he could get a job prepped that had to print last night. At his old job this would of been unpaid time but now that he is back to hourly it makes it a little easier to know a majority of the day was at time and 1/2. He's such a great husband, he was back up at 4am to do it all over again!! He is also refining his resume and he got a call from another old "client" wondering if he wanted a job. He turned it down, seeing as it was an afternoon shift kind of thing, but still I think that's at least a dozen calls he's gotten with more work.

I don't have any big plans today. Just to keep making progress on my "Blackwork Princess". I may even get a chance to finish it up today depending on how motivated I stay. Then there is the ever present laundry and dishes. I know it's "my" job and why I'm home but some days I get sick of doing the dishes.

I'm also going to head to the library to return some books. I'm also going to have to talk to the librarian because I was checking on-line last night to make sure I had all the books I took out. They have me down as still having 4 books out that I *know* I returned. This isn't the first time it has happened either. They don't have enough people sometimes and it often takes days(one time almost a week) for returned books to be checked back in. This isn't the first time a couple of books have slipped through the cracks. The last time I found the two books on the shelf that I supposedly had out. I really should check out some of the other libraries in my network.

It's been awhile since the big blow up on the board. I'm still getting "I miss you" notes in my in-box. I also have to say I miss the board. I've been reading it, I've found a new outlet as well, but I miss some of the friends I had there. I miss the give/take of the board. I have a bunch of questions I would like to ask but feel like I can't. I also find it pretty interesting that all the people that I "supposedly" drove off by the mere sight of my name, aren't posting anymore than they had. I know they are reading since I've seen there names at the top but no posts. I'm beginning to wonder how "disruptive" my posting really was.

I got to find some warmer, clean, clothes for G and get him to school. Only two more weeks for him and he will be done from school.

Edited to add:

Let's see if I figured out the picture thing too:
Image hosted by

I figured since I was talking about her I would show my progress. Can I finish her today? You will have to check back later.

And I was going to go off on a tangent. I had it all written in my head of what I *really* wanted to say to someonebut I won't. I'll just consider myself in good company since I am just one of many that she professes to dislike but continues to track down and rant about anyways. And maybe now I don't miss the board. I have my friends, and all the good people, the people you really cared about, have long since drifted away...or ran off by her.

I'm going to leave with a postive thought today:

"Do something magical today and don’t tell anyone about it. You’ll know and that’s all that counts. Let the recipient of the gesture think that the chain of events has worked in their favor finally." Jason Mraz, Online journal, 5/9/2005

I have a little something that I'm going to do today and I will continue to remember what "goes around, comes around" :D

Wednesday, May 11, 2005

There was something wrong with our internet connection yesterday. I could barely get to my e-mail or any place else. At first this was a bit frustrating and I felt out of touch with the world. Then I realized it was a good thing. A day away from the computer would be a good thing. I got a lot done. I got some spring cleaning done, got the rest of the summer clothes out and washed and got some stitching out.

Yep, I dragged out some stitching. I went through my stash on Sunday to see if there was anything I wanted to part with. I found a few things but I started to feel excited as I looked at some of my kitted up projects and realized I really wanted to stitch these things. I took out "Blackwork Princess" by Dragon Dreams. I have a lots of good memories of this project. I bought it directly from Jennifer Aikman-Smith when I was in Toronto last October. I reminded me of hanging out with her and Misty and Delphine. I had it started and I managed to get a lot done on it yesterday. I may even get it done by the weekend or Monday. It's also weird, the more stitching I do, the more things I get done. I set the timer and I stitched for 20-25 minutes and then cleaned for 40 minutes. It worked out well and my house is back in order.

Last night was my favorite night for TV. There was a new "Gilmore Girl" on and it wasn't pre-empted because of basketball. At first I was really excited but after the episode I thought it was only so-so. I've been watching the first few seasons in re-runs and they are far better then the shows this season.

Then it was "The Amazing Race". I'm glad Joyce and Uchenna won. I was secretly wishing Amber and Rob would win but I knew that if they did fans of the show would be ticked so I think it worked out well. I wonder how long until the next race begins?

Today is a 1/2 day for Donovan. He's looking forward to having the afternoon off. I hate the 1/2 days though because I have to get Donovan from school at 11:18am and then get across town to get G at 11:30am. I usually always make it with a minute or two to spare but I always worry that I'm going to be late!!

Of course now that I have all the summer clothes out the weather is going to turn colder but the last couple of days have been amazingly warm and summer like. Summer should be here soon!!

And how could I forget to mention that my concert ticket to see Jason arrived in the mail late Monday afternoon. It came in a plain white envelope and it frankly, looked like a bill. I don't owe anyone anything but still I was nervous when I opened and was super excited when I saw the ticket. It only lists Alanis Morisette's name but still. Days until the concert: 28

Monday, May 09, 2005

Happy Monday!!

I think they should do away with Mother's Day. It's too much pressure all the way around. It's a lot like Valentines Day. You feel in a way you have to measure your self worth and how much you are loved by what kind of gifts you receive. It's not a good way to measure it. I'm also sure there were plenty of husbands and wives that had to spend part of their day with in-laws they would rather not be around.

My day wasn't horrible by any means. Sure, I didn't get to sleep in but I did get my nap. We did spend some time at my MIL house who I like but my SIL, her boyfriend and kids were there. A few years ago this would of been a great way to spend an afternoon. In the last few months things have become really strained. It's obvious from my MIL point of view her daughter can do no wrong. Making conversation with her slacker boyfriend is painful as well. I don't get what she sees in him. It also feels a lot of the time like Billy and I are intruding in something since they are there so much of the time.

Then there was a my neice with her ever present boyfriend. It's like they are joined at the hip and can't be apart. Why wasn't he at home with is mom? It boggles my mind that both my SIL and ex-BIL allow this. I think there is such a thing as "family" time and "social" time.

I did decide to take it easy after seeing my MIL. I let Billy make dinner(all he had to do is heat up some spaghetti sauce). He also had to make cupcakes with G for a bake sale his preschool is doing to raise money to adopt an animal at the zoo. I went to bed...I didn't sleep but did finally get my wish to stitch a little, read a little and go to sleep early. If I knew what I was going to face in my kitchen this morning I may not of done that. It was completely trashed. It took me a good 10 minutes to just clear a spot on the counter to make Donovan's breakfast and pack his lunch. After I get G to school I suspect I face a good hour of clean-up to set it to rights. Where did all the dishes come from? I know there were a few and there was just the 3 of them for dinner so really where did they come from? There was also cake batter and frosting all over the place.

And the cupcakes. How hard is it to put a piece of foil over the pans? Dh neglected this little chore and the cupcakes are a little hard this morning. I will accept some of the blame since I didn't *tell* him to cover them but I thought that was a given. I will just have to take them as is since I have neither the time nor money in the bank to make more(and I could go on and on about the bank issue but I won't. It will make me too angry so I will skip that). Then there was the laundry that never made it in the dryer but thankfully I got up early enough that I was able to dry 2 pairs of pants so the boys had pants for school. I wonder how many other moms woke up to something similar in their houses this morning? Next year on Mother's Day I'm just going to treat it like a regular day so I don't have to spend all of the next day doing what I normally do plus clean up from the day before.

I'm also feeling a bit tired this morning which is why this all bugged me more than it would normally. Last night the neighbor's had a HUGE fight. There was yelling, screaming, crying, banging, and from the sounds of things some throwing of stuff as well. They began fighting about midnight and continued for a good 30 minutes before the cops arrived(I had the phone in hand to call myself). It broke up pretty easily but I had a hard time going back to sleep. I laid there for a good 90 mins listening to a book on tape before I could go back to sleep. Thankfully the kids slept through it as did Dh.

Today the weather is going to be gorgeous, 80ish, sunny with a slight chance of rain. I hope to get a chance to enjoy some of the day outside, watching the kids play.

Countdown to Jason concert: 30 days!!!!

Sunday, May 08, 2005

Happy Mother's Day to all the moms out there!!!

Billy really took me at my word when I said all I wanted was to go out yesterday with my friends cause that is all I got. I was awakened at 5:45 by G and had to get up with him because DH was "tired"(more about that later). I made breakfast for all(muffins) and set to getting the dishes and laundry done so we have clean clothes. DH got up around 8am and watched the news and had coffee.

I got a nice gift from G, a "mom's survival kit" they made at preschool. It was very sweet and very cute. I also got a poem and handprints on Friday. Donovan brought home a Petunia for me to plant along with a hand written card on Friday. I've tucked them away with all my other memories in my memory box.

I wasn't expecting a gift or anything like that before I sound ungrateful but a card from him would of been nice. I even joked breakfast in bed, consisting of pop tarts and tea would suffice. Ah well, next year!! I did at least talk the kids out of taking me to the zoo today. Donovan is a tad disappointed but I wasn't up for walking all day and putting up with the crowds. They have to learn that sitting at home, going absolutely nowhere, in my pj's, hair in a ponytail, doing nothing more than napping, reading, stitching is a *great* day for me. I promised next weekend we would go to the zoo.

Yesterday was our Michigan/Ohio GTG. We've been kicking around the idea since last November and actively planning it for several months. We had a list of people from here that wanted to go as well as a bunch of people in Ohio we were to meet. One by one they all found other things they had to do. One person got sent plane tickets to see her family and grandchild, another person was in an accident and another person was short on cash due to buying a condo. A person here had to cancel cause her husband had to go out of town. I understand that things come up and if you let me know ahead of time great. It was the others who didn't show up that was frustrating. We waited at one house close to an hour for someone to show up, no call, no e-mail, no nothing.

We made it to Ohio in record time that's to Momma Andrettie, Misty!! We went to a LNS where we were supposed to meet 2 people. The store was nice, the help super friendly and nice but no show on the people we were meeting. We waited almost 90 minutes before leaving the store for lunch.

We had a great relaxing lunch and then headed to a Hobby Lobby. The store was a disappointment. The stitching section was tiny. I bought just some scissors(one of my weaknesses).

It was still pretty early in the day and way too early for most of us to go home so we pondered what to do from there. We headed back to Michigan where we hit another LNS near Misty's house, a Michael's, and a Jo-Ann's where they were super duper helpful.

After that we were going to grab some coffee/dessert so we went to Baker's Square. Upon smelling food we were all suddenly starving so we had a late dinner with our dessert.

We then took Delphine home, headed back to Misty's where we played with her new copier by making a working copy of something that was way too small. Ruth was kind enough to bring me home. I had left the house at 8am and didn't get back until a little before 11pm. It was a good day though even if it was just us again.

I came home and Billy then informed me he had to go to the office. He swears he told me he had to do this before but he didn't. He was out the door within minutes of me walking in the door. I was little disappointment because I was looking forward to sharing my day. I sat up for awhile, stitched, read a little, watched some TV and feel asleep about 2am. He did wake me up at 3am when he came in. He brought home some McDonald's and we shared a burger....I guess technically that could be considered breakfast in bed.

I had a bit of money with me when we were shopping but I found very little that caught my eye. I did buy some over dyed floss and a Just Nan pattern. Once I got the pattern home and looked more closely at the colors and decided I didn't really like it. I put it up for sale and I hope I can get what I paid for it. I technically spent more on my two meals yesterday than stash.

Billy is bugging about going to his moms house. I'm hoping that we can put that off until after dinner but I I really just want to finish my book and take a nap!! I should also say he didn't get her a card either so it wasn't just me who didn't get one.

Today it is officially one month to my Jason concert. Let the countdown begin!!!

Friday, May 06, 2005

Warning: Much Jason Mraz Gushing to Follow!!

Jason's single "Wordplay" is due out on May 16th. Since I don't listen to the radio very often and none of them in the area play his type of stuff I figured it would take forever to hear it. I was good and when they were trading his single all over the place I resisted(damn, copyright laws!). This morning I popped over to his fan board to see what was up. Someone posted a link to a radio station in Indiana that was doing an interview with him that was available to stream online. He was supposed to be on between 10-11am and since it was already 10:30am I figured I'd missed him. Within minutes of logging on to the site I heard the the sound of his voice. Bonus day, I got to hear him talk. He talked about the album. He sounds so proud of it!! It's nice to get a bit of an insight into the process. He then proceeded to play his new single, not the studio version, but an acoustical version, just him and his guitar. Now his studio stuff is fine but damn, when it's him and his guitar I gotta tell you it's magic!!! His voice to me is like relaxation and sex at the same time. It has such a way of soothing and exciting at the same time. He should come with a warning label.

The new song is awesome, as I knew it would be. It's deep, gotta listen to the words, he pokes fun at himself, at his fans(nicely) and the music industry as a whole. It has a super catchy hook to it so maybe it might actually be a hit. Maybe in the future when I say "Jason Mraz" I won't get a dumb look. The Chick DJ was funny when she said she could sit and listen to him play all day. I was so jealous to be that close to him, of course if I was, I don't think he would be playing for very long.

Me and the girl on the fan board are finalizing our t-shirt plans. She has a couple of nifty ideas along with mine. We are trying to see if we can get a couple more people to sign on too!!

/Gushing offically over!

And yes, I did just enable the comments, I hope I'm not opening myself up to more abuse. I'm still getting the hang of this whole thing and hopefully I'll be able to make this look a bit nicer in the future.

Happy Friday!!!

Yeah, made it through another week of shuffling the one car around. I love the fact I didn't have to get up early to take Dh to work or have to worry about getting Gaelan to school. I have no where I have to be until 3:28 when I pick Donovan up at the bus.

Speaking of Donovan he was a terror this morning. I hate to say this but I will, I was glad to send him to school. If he had been home today, stayed in that mood, I don't know if we both would of made it to the end of the day. He's a good kid, just doesn't know when to STOP, with anything. He just has to push, and push and push. I don't mind when he talks back at home, Ok, I mind, but still I would rather he have some kind of spirit. It's when he mouths off in public that I get ticked, like at the bus stop this morning. He is now grounded from everything and I was glad he got on the bus. Thankfully, so far, he has been really well behaved in school.

I was greeted to a nice e-mail this morning. My tickets to my Jason concert are now printed and will be mailed to me shortly. It's just a little over a month until I go. I'm still amazed I paid $80 to see a 40 minute set. Me and another girl on the Jason Fan board are pondering having t-shirts made to show our Jason Love!! Does that make me sound like I'm 16 or something...? Ah well, he makes me giddy!! At the very least I'm going to find something pink to wear. He seems to be favoring that color a lot lately, probably to go along with his song "Geek in Pink". A friend pointed out that most people won't be there to see Jason(yea, I know that) and that there might be some talking during his performance. I hope not to much!

As quickly as the slight thaw happened between Billy and I, it was right back to square one last night. He was cold, distant and overly moody last night. I tried to chalk it up to him being sick but I don't know. It seems like he's always like this. He didn't even want to snuggle last night, I got no good night kiss or a kiss goodbye when he left. He also spent about 90 mins chatting with Steph via ICQ. In one way it's good that we have the laptop in the living room so I can see what he's doing(not that I watched what he was saying) and I can monitor how long they chat but on the other hand I really didn't want to know the extent of the conversations. He sure seemed chatty to her and to Dave and to Scott but I could barely get a grunt out of him. I tried to take care of him, see if he wanted anything, but cold shoulder all the way around. I'm trying to remain optimistic but I don't know....I don't see things changing anytime soon and wonder still how much more distant can we become.

I'm looking forward to the weekend. I'm going to have fun tomorrow. The whole day with my friends. I predict much fun, much laughter, lots of shopping, good food and if I'm lucky a bit of chocolate!!!

Thursday, May 05, 2005

Happy Cino De May0!!!

I know that means something but I never did figure it out. I think it's just an excuse to go out and drink and celebrate!! Happy birthday to my friend Diane!!

Billy and I were going to go out tonight. A lodge buddy of his helps to manage a bar and they were having a celebration. We were going to go after dinner, have a couple of drinks and be home in plenty of time to put the kids in bed. We aren't going now! Billy is sick again!!

He seemed fine on Monday, complained about his sinuses bugging him on Tuesday and by yesterday afternoon he had called and made a dr's appt. I was shocked, normally he wanders around for days before going so the fact he went meant he was feeling bad. He has an ear/throat infection along with a pretty nasty case of bronchitis. He came home with a couple of prescriptions and went to bed early. I'm beginning to wonder if I don't need to maybe burn down my house or get an exorcism here with all the illness we've passed around since Jan. I think I"m a reasonable housekeeper but we still seem to be getting sick. I guess it does make sense since we now have 2 kids in school, and DH went from a job where he was in contact with maybe 8-10 people a day(if that) to an office of over a 100 people. With all that contact with community phones, computers, pens and the like I guess it's no surprise we are passing things back and forth.

I'm hoping he will feel better by this weekend so I won't feel too guilty about going with my friends on Saturday. I eeked a little extra money out of our regular budget as well as telling him to skip a Mother's Day gift and give me CASH instead.

I don't want to be too hopeful but I think there may be a bit of a thawing in our relationship. I have been pretty quiet about how things had been going but they were bad, and scary. Divorce was not something I had ever considered but I couldn't help wondering if that may of been where we were headed. I would say out of 17 years being together all but 3 have been really good. The las t 18 months or so have been bad, and declining steadily. I didn't think it could get much lower. The only thing keeping me going was the belief that he wouldn't just abandon me and the kids and leave me to fend for myself but I didn't like the idea of him being around out of obligation either

The last month or so has been a bit of a thaw. I've seen little glimmers of the old husband I loved. We've started to go out more, we've started to talk a bit more. Monday was the most encouragement yet. I was little tipsy when we came home from doing the lodges mailing and he was joking and teasing me like the old days. We went to sleep laughing and holding hands(a rarity now a days). He left me a message while I was shopping that said he "enjoyed laughing with me and had missed that" Hey, he missed me!! Do I think everything is great now? Hardly but I'll take it!!

Wednesday, May 04, 2005

Day: Wednesday
Weather: Cold, Frosty

Just some random thoughts...

I hate basketball. Especially when it pre-empts my TV viewing. I've become a huge Gilmore Girl fan in the last couple of months since watching the re-runs on The Family Channel. I've been trying to watch the new season on the WB but it keeps getting pre-empted by basketball in my town. Now I will have to hunt down their website and figure out when they will be showing it.

Jason has a new website, I don't like it. It's a little to slick, a little too polished. The thing I liked about Jason was he wasn't slick or polished, he was a self professed geek. He was an incredibly hot geek but a geek none the less. I liked the fact he hid behind his hats because then it was something special when you saw him without it. Now on his sites there are hatless pics everywhere. And what is it with the whole school theme as well? Are they trying to make him younger? Or appeal to younger audiences? He's nearly 30 people....Of coure everyone has to grow up eventually but I liked him the old way. Part of me hopes his new album is just a minor success, enough to keep him going but not make him too huge. I kind of like him as my little secret crush. Is that bad?

I keep learning that I'm a much more petty person than I thought. Someone is in pain and I can't spare an ounce of sympathy for them. In fact I kind of looked at as karmic revenge. She has been really hateful recently, not just to me, but someone else as well. Maybe a couple of days might give her chance to see the error of her ways...Nah, but we can hope.

What is up with Cingular? I have a pick up and go phone through AT & T. I have the cell phone only for emergencies. The only people who have the number are Billy and the schools. I put $10 worth of minutes(which was about 30 minutes of local area talk time) in Jan and it took until mid-April for them to expire completely. In that time AT & T merged with Cingular. I called to add $10 more worth of minutes and discovered that is no longer an option. The smallest you can do is $15 BUT those minutes expire in 30 days. If I want minutes to last longer I have to buy $30, $40, $50 worth of time. They last like 45 days and if I buy $100 then they will last 90 days. There is no way I can talk that much, there is no way I want to talk that much. I guess I will have to find another option. For now the phone makes a great alarm clock since ours is busted.

I dreamed about an old online friend last night. Missy(MissyCor) from the BB. I really liked Missy and I know she is going through a really rough patch in her life with her father's illness. I can understand why she left the board and why she dropped her blog as well. I dreamed I ran into her, gave her a big hug and told her everyone missed her. Then she told me her dad died and we cried together. I then woke up. I hope she is well.

Gotta get G to school. Only one more day after today this week. Only 3 weeks after that. I'm now one day closer to my Jason Concert, and one day closer to my GTG this weekend with the Michigan Stitchers. Both I'm looking forward to!!!

Tuesday, May 03, 2005

How can I be hung over on a Tuesday?

Last night Billy, the kids and I went over the Mary's house to get the trestelboard(it's like a monthly newsletter) and some information for tomorrow's night meeting, copied, collated, folded, stuffed and sealed. It makes sense to go to her house. She has the copier, folder, and sealer at her house. Last month it took us quite awhile to do it. The list still wasn't complete, half the stuff was still on Rolf's computer and Billy was still getting the hang of the database. This month we did get it done much quicker.

Part way through the process Mary was nice enough to offer me something to drink. She didn't have any diet soda in the house so I passed. She then mentioned margarita's. She had some pre-mixed stuff in her fridge. I'm not much of a drinker, not something I do often, but this sounded good. She poured us a couple and we sat down and started stuffing the envelopes. Before I knew it 2 hours had elapsed, my glass never seemed to be empty, and I was feeling pleasantly tipsy as I left. It was very weird to be drunk, on a Monday night, well before 10pm. It feels even funnier to by slightly hung over on a Tuesday morning. Still it was great fun.

I hope Mary enjoyed it as well. I can't imagine what it must be like losing your husband after 38 years of marriage. They had a good marriage too. They still seemed to really like each other, got along well, and did an awful lot of things together. It sounds like Mary is trying to keep busy and doing things. I think the summer will be hard when she is off from teaching but she had a list of things she wanted to get done and a trip to Scotland to look forward.

I also one of the things I really like about Mary is that she is not shy about telling you exactly what you need. You never wonder with her. If she needs you to look at something for her she asks. There is no guessing.

I meant yesterday to find the time to sit down and talk about the rest of my weekend but didn't find the time. I had to go to the grocery store, pick Billy up from work and get a bunch of stuff done around the house.

Today I'm going to take it a bit more easier. My plan had been to sort through my stash again, get rid of what I don't want anymore and get some other stuff in that room thrown out. Tomorrow is garbage day and it's the perfect day for it. My head however is pounding so maybe after I get G to school and get the stamps for the trestleboards from the Post Office, I may take a wee nap. Maybe this afternoon I'll get to the stash....

It's also such a shame that in this whole mess that my enjoyment of stiching has also been diminished. Right or Wrong so much of my stiching is also wrapped up with my online world. A majority of it was bought after seeing and hearing things from other stitchers. I have projects, like "Fairy Moon" that when I look at them I not only think about my stitching process but the fact that I chose a similar fabric after seeing Carrie stitch hers. As my feelings towards the online world changed, my feelings towards stitching has also changed. The World Wide Web is so vast but it can feel so small and inhabited by such small people as well.

Off to take G to school...